Loss in a Time of Community Crisis

By Nancy Jackson

How does it feel to be away from your loved ones? For many families, inconvenient. But, they learned to use social media and Zoom to stay connected. They celebrated holidays, birthdays and graduations in unique ways. But what if you couldn’t see your loved ones, what if they were ill and had to have treatment without you? What if they were restricted in their rooms at hospitals, nursing homes and senior living centers, where you could not see or touch them? And even worse, what if they died without you being there and you couldn’t have a funeral?

Oh my, how do you cope now with the grief, the guilt, the shock and the lack of closure? For so many today, that is a pressing reality––their loved one is now gone and they didn’t have the opportunity to say goodbye. Learning how to mourn and express your grief without closure moments such as being there at the death, a funeral or a family gathering can make you feel like you don’t know where to go. Your grief is an expression of your love and the best ways to cope include finding a way to share it with ours.

For many it begins with some type of ceremony, whether that is now at home with close family or holding a funeral or graveside service when it is safe to have a larger gathering. You can participate in support groups, journal, share with trusted friends and even find creative outlets to express your feelings. If guilt is an on-going issue, then consider seeking professional support.

Find an activity that was special that you shared with your loved one, like riding through the countryside on Sunday afternoon. One of the ways that I connect to my father is by playing a round of golf, he loved to play and it lifts my spirits to “play” with him. Each of us is unique, take the time to find your closure as you begin mourning.

Should you have any questions or are in need of support, call Home Hospice at 903-868-9315.